Satire by John W. Lillpop
Poor Hillary Rodham Clinton. Just when it looked as though there was a glimmer of hope that she might someday become president owing to Barack Obama's stumble butting, old pal Norman Hsu got himself sentenced to 24 years in prison for campaign fraud.
Without professional fraud merchants like Hsu on her side, there is no way Hillary can raise the money it will take to stab Obama in the back and steal the 2012 Presidential nomination out from under him.
As reported at Yahoonews.com, in part:
"Former Democratic fundraiser Norman Hsu was sentenced Tuesday to more than 24 years in prison by a judge who accused him of funding his fraud by manipulating the political process in a way that 'strikes at the very core of our democracy.'
"U.S. District Judge Victor Marrero sentenced the 58-year-old Hsu, who raised money for Hillary Rodham Clinton and others, to 20 years in prison for his guilty plea to fraud charges and another four years and four months in prison for his conviction at trial for breaking campaign finance laws.
"In a lengthy criticism of Hsu's fraud, the judge said the former fundraiser used political contributions to win respect and impress investors as he committed campaign finance fraud.
'Mr. Hsu's disgraceful use of political campaigns to perpetuate his Ponzi schemes, as well as his acts of campaign finance fraud, strikes at the very core of our democracy,' Marrero said.
"The judge said Hsu stole more than $50 million from hundreds of investors in a 10-year Ponzi scheme by winning their confidence with his pristine reputation and friendly nature, a two-faced quality the judge noted was common among certain white collar criminals.
"He described Hsu as a wolf in sheep's clothing. He said his 'conniving use of the political process to fund his fraud made his crimes much more sinister and reprehensible.'
"Before he was sentenced, Hsu apologized.
"His donations became an embarrassment for Clinton's presidential campaign. His arrest led Clinton to return more than $800,000 to donors linked to him."
So where in the hell was Hillary Rodham when her pal needed her the most?
No one is certain, although speculation was rampant that she was meeting with senior advisors to determine the practicality of suspending her presidential aspirations until 2034, the year after Hsu is to be released and the earliest he would be available to resume election fraud on her behalf.
Hillary supporters point out that she would be only 85 years old and would probably not have Slick around to muck up her campaign by then.
Another staff member commented "off the record" that by 2034 the American people would probably be over the "Must elect a black hysteria," which should improve Hillary's chances even more.
