What Would YOU Call Barbara Boxer?

Satire by John W. Lillpop

As a resident of California and an American patriot to boot, I have had the honor and privilege of voting against Barbara Boxer on three separate occasions during her long and tragic career as a candidate for the U.S. Senate.

Over those many years, I confess to not even once thinking of Boxer as a legitimate "Senator," although I do have a number of other monikers for her, none of which can be published on a family web site.

Therefore, it was with particular interest that I read of Barbara Boxer's verbal sparring match with Army Corps of Engineers division leader, Brigadier General Michael Walsh.

As reported at politicsdaily.com, in part:

"At a sometimes contentious Capitol Hill hearing Tuesday, Senate Environment and Public Works Committee chairwoman, Sen. Barbara Boxer (D-CA), had a request for Army Corps of Engineers division leader, Brigadier General Michael Walsh.

"During a terse exchange, as Boxer pressed Walsh on why the levees in New Orleans are still not repaired nearly four years after Hurricane Katrina, she said to Walsh:

"Could you say 'senator' instead of 'ma'am? It's just a thing. I worked so hard to get that title. I'd appreciate it."

The general's response? "Yes, Senator."

Brigadier General Walsh deserves high praise and kudos for the extraordinary restraint and respect he lavished on one of the most despicable leftists ever to sit in the U.S. Senate.

Had it been right-wing extremist John Lillpop answering the question, the response might have been slightly less polite and sans any trace of PC.

Given the opportunity, I might have chosen other, more appropriate responses like one of the following:

* Can I get back to you on that, Ma'am?

* I could, but I will not. But fret not, this little temper tantrum will get you plenty of sound bites on the evening news!

* Sorry, BB. I do not take orders from no stinkin' person what has to sit down to pee!

* How about a compromise: Grand dame?

* I would be happy to, if you will please first show me your birth certificate, ma'am.

* For a sawed off little feminist, ya got a lot of spunk, ain't ya?

* Does this mean that I should call that illegal alien in the White House "president?"

* I would, but for the fact that you seem to have a fetish about surrounding yourself with staff members who are also child pornographers.

Do the names Jeff P. Rosato and Bernie Ward ring a bell? What's with the perverts? Have you considered recruiting somewhere other than 'Frisco, ma'am?


Of course, any one of those replies would have caused me to be arrested immediately and charged with the felony crime of flagrant truth telling and hateful and excessive transparency.

Which would deny me the chance to vote against Boxer a fourth time in 2010.

What would YOU call Barbara Boxer?