Happy Cinco de Julyo?

By John W. Lillpop

Here we are, the day after the 234th birthday of our great nation. All 350 million of us, joined together by a great and enduring love for—the faltering U.S. dollar.

The birthday of the most successful, prosperous civilization in human history is truly a day for celebration in America and throughout the world as it marks a huge victory for liberty and freedom over the evils of tyranny and oppressive government.

That being the case, why would any red-blooded American taint the pageantry by uttering, “Happy Cinco de Julyo”?

After all Cinco de Mayo is bad enough. Independence Day is set aside for scores of millions of American patriots to honor our heritage, our flag, our language--for Newly Arrived Refugees that would be English, thank you!

And go straight to the living hell, Janet Napolitano!

However, those us those who take Independence Day and the U.S. Constitution seriously need to exercise a bit of caution in our words and actions.

Moderation is the key, patriot.

Remember, while most view the celebration of America as a wondrous occasion, there are those among us who might be offended by a “vulgar display of excessive Americanism.”

Excessive Americanism as in displaying Old Glory at schools, churches, libraries, and any public place for more than 20 minutes without cause and a license.

Think of all the damage that could be done to the self-esteem of Mexican students in Morgan Hill, what with all of those “foreign” U.S. flags being flaunted in their faces!

Think DIVERSITY, Patriot!

Just because it happens to be the anniversary of the day on which a gang of fat, old white Christian males officially codified their theft of land rightfully belonging to the Apache and other Indian tribes 234 years ago is no reason to go overboard with the celebrations.

Think DIVERSITY, Patriot!

Red, white, and blue might have been cool in 1776, but in 2010 we must also celebrate brown, black, yellow, and purple in order to be truly inclusive.

Remember, too, that according to moon bats, the U.S. Constitution is, itself, unconstitutional because they were no women, gays, transgenders, handicapped, blacks, Hispanics, Asians, American Indians, non-English speakers, Muslims. Jews, AIDS-infected activists, Buddhists, PETA members, death penalty opponents, or suicide bombers among the Founding Fathers!

With that in mind, perhaps it IS appropriate to say, Happy Cinco de Julyo!