Moon Bats Mourn News about Rush Limbaugh

Satire by John W. Lillpop

For the briefest of moments this morning, left wing nut balls all across America got a head start on the celebrations and hell –raising slated to ring in the New Year at midnight.

Liberal spirits were boosted by news from that on-line leftist rag, Wikipedia, which excitedly announced the demise of Rush Limbaugh on the island of Oahu, where, incidentally, Barack Obama was NOT born.

Champagne bottles were prematurely uncorked, noise makers and confetti went free for the taking at DNC branches, and Harry Reid declared that Rush’s passing was about 50 years too late.

Not a dry eye was to be found as moon bats from coast-to-coast cried with unrestrained joy at the Wikipedia breaking news.

El Rushbo was no more!

Then came the tragic news from Oahu: Not only had Rush survived, but now the bloke was resting comfortably and was expected to be back on the air as scheduled next week!

Dark, deep down depression among the left was the inevitable response.

Shrieker of the House Nancy Pelosi left her $10,000 a night bungalow in Kona on the “Big Island” long enough to try to cheer up dispirited moon bates.

Said she, “This would not have happened if ObamaCare had been in place. We would have recognized the name and would have ordered an immediate stop to all treatment, including assisted breathing. This we would have done for the children, the poor, and the hopeless.”

Pelosi also reminded her audience that Limbaugh had all the symptoms of a heart attack which, as she put it, “gives us all hope for a better outcome in 2010!”