The Next Step in Liberal Insanity: The Illegal Invader Bill of Rights

By John W. Lillpop

With illegal invaders the hottest political topic in Washington these days, there is word of an emerging “Illegal invader Bill of Rights” which Democrats are expected to introduce on the floor of the US Senate.

Prominent Democrats have announced that if such a bill falters in Congress, President Obama has reserved the right to issue an Executive Order to effect its implementation. Retroactively, no less!

The Democrat-Marxist bill of rights for illegal aliens is expected to include the following leftist pap:

* There is NO such thing as an “illegal” human being;

* Concepts of nationality and citizenship which confer special rights and advantages upon individuals based on arbitrary factors such as place of birth are ‘old school’ nonsense.

Enlightened peoples the world over now understand that All human beings are born into the family of World Citizens, regardless of the exact place of birth, and that citizenship is fungible based on where the citizen is at any given time;

* Borders are antithetical to the concept of universal human freedom and are understood to be barriers erected by “haves” to prevent the oppressed and poor from securing a “fair share” of the abundance created for all.

As such, borders are evil manifestations of greed and exclusivity, which are to be ignored when said borders interfere with the inalienable right to the pursuit of happiness by the individual world citizen, wherever and whenever said world citizen may choose to exercise such right;

* All world citizens are automatically imbued with certain inalienable rights which shall not be infringed upon in any manner by any government or other human entity, including religious institutions;

* These inalienable rights shall include the unimpeded right to the pursuit of happiness, regardless of ability to pay;

* Such rights guarantee to each world citizen, the following rights: The acquisition and enjoyment of comfortable housing; adequate, delicious, and nourishing foods specific to the religious and ethnic needs of the individual; advanced health care (regardless of pre-existing conditions), including contraception and abortion services, dental care, prescription medications, and all other care as may be necessary for abundant, care-free living; advanced education based solely on the ability, aptitude, and interest of the individual citizen; and access to high-speed internet service, Wi-Fi connections, and all communications technology generally available to the paying public.

Said rights are not all inclusive and may be added to or enhanced, but never diminished or withdrawn.

* Driving and voting are among the most sacred rights owned by each and every world citizen. Discriminatory practices such as citizenship status, registration, voter ID, vision and driving tests, and others are not to tolerated in civil societies;

* Unrestricted access to public services such as food stamps, welfare and other entitlement programs is vital to the pursuit of happiness and shall, therefore, always be available to all world citizens;

* Each world citizen, regardless of race, religion, nation of origin, sexual orientation, political affiliation, credit, criminal, or medical history, is a unique expression of the creator, and as such, is owed the utmost in respect and acceptance from society at large.

Terms like illegal, anchor baby, alien, wet back, moocher, invader, and the like are dehumanizing and injurious to the esteem and dignity of world citizens. Use of such terms is considered a major hate crime subject to severe punishment under the law, except when terms like Gringo, racist pig, white trash and other words are used to truthfully identify the root cause of all of humanity’s woes.

In sum, the legitimate rights of disaffected world citizens can be gleaned from the words spoken by Zeituni Onyango, illegal-alien aunt of President Obama.

She said:

“If I come as an immigrant, you have the obligation to make me a citizen,” Zeituni Onyango said.”

Where do you suppose Auntie got that warped view of the world?

Aunt Onyango, the perfect spokesperson and poster child for the Illegal Invader bill of rights!