By John W. Lillpop
Each year, Major League Baseball bestows the "Cy Young Award" to the two best pitchers in the sport, one from the American League and another for the National League.
The award is named after baseball legend Cy Young who won a remarkable 511 games over his major league career. Until now, the award has been given to those hurlers who have actually accomplished greatness on the ball diamond.
However, with the precedent established by the Noel Peace Prize Award for hope and promises, the Lords of Baseball need to rethink the prestigious Cy Young Award.
In fact, why not grant both awards to that southpaw from Washington, D.C., the black kid who is tearing up the league with his pitches for socialized medicine and universal communism?
True, Obama has never pitched in the major leagues, or as a professional at any level. He has no record of accomplishment, no known athletic ability, and there is no other objective reason for honoring him with the Cy Young Award.
However, President Obama has thrown out the "First Pitch" at a couple of important games this year and will surely be asked to do like wise sometime during the World Series over the next few weeks.
Given his obsession with being on television 24/7, Obama may even throw out the first pitch before each of the seven games of the 2009 Fall Classic, which would establish a new record for most World Series appearances by a left-handed Marxist community organizer born in Kenya.
That alone should qualify Obama for something--impeachment and deportation not being among the most preferred options!
It is true that Obama's pitch for ObamaCare and other socialist programs has failed miserably, but he is, as they say, a "work in progress."
President Obama should be judged on his promises to end all wars, rid the world of offensive weapons including BB guns and spit ball launchers, reverse global warming, end the global economic depression, jettison racism out of the world, and punish the rich for the audacity of success.
With those promises on Obama's resume, surely the Baseball Writer's Association of America can see fit to bend the rules slightly by giving both Cy Young Awards to America's omnipotent lefty?
