Satire by John W. Lillpop
In the ongoing battle for language dominance across our great land, six enlightened officers of the Dallas police department have established a creative, fair, and reasonable plan for resolving the dispute once and for all:
They issue traffic citations to drivers for not speaking English!
As reported at dallasnews.com, in part: (+)
"Dallas police wrongly ticketed at least 39 drivers for not speaking English over the last three years, Police Chief David Kunkle announced Friday while promising to investigate all officers involved in the cases for dereliction of duty.
"The case that led to the discovery of all the others occurred Oct. 2, when Ernestina Mondragon was stopped for making an illegal U-turn in the White Rock area. Rookie Officer Gary Bromley cited Mondragon for three violations: disregarding a traffic control device, failure to present a driver's license and "non-English speaking driver."
"In that case and perhaps the others, officials said, the officer was confused by a pull-down menu on his in-car computer that listed the charge as an option. But the law the computer referred to is a federal statute regarding commercial drivers that Kunkle said his department does not enforce. "
Hooray and bravo! for the six officers who had the guts to deal with this thorny issue in a responsible manner.
People who do not speak English are clearly a hazard on the roadways and should be banned from driving altogether.
Further refinement of this issue requires the following actions:
( )Police should have the option of tasering rowdy Spanish speakers into submission when needed to protect the public from language abuse, and
( )Repeat offenders should be immediately deported to Mexico, regardless of US citizenship and immigration status.
The only down side may be in communicating all pertinent information to those criminals identified as non-English speakers.
A new law may be required: Make it a felony hate crime to operate any motor vehicle without at least one competent English speaker in said vehicle.
Non-English speakers: Bad for the roadways, bad for America!
+http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/DN-citations_23met.ART.State.Edition2.4bac015.html?nTar=OPUR
