Satire by John W. Lillpop
In an obvious attempt to upstage Governor Sarah Palin and her fabulously successful Going Rogue, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has entered the book selling fray with her bleeding heart autobiography, appropriately titled Going Rouge.
While Governor Palin’s book is a rehashing of mundane political experiences from the 2008 presidential campaign, Pelosi’s book is more intellectually stimulating as it is describes the economic, social, and physical challenges that the most powerful woman in America faces in her never-ending journey to mask her 69 years with a lethal combination of botox and prescription cosmetics.
Pelosi provides a fascinating, but heartbreaking, account of her daily regime which requires her to get out of bed at 3am in order to complete her rouge routine which takes five hours to complete.
While Going Rogue is billed as a non-partisan, non-political work, Pelosi does stray a bit when it comes to promoting the trillion dollar health care reform bill that recently passed the House.
According to Pelosi, all women have a constitutional right to look as young as possible regardless of the costs involved, or impact on the federal deficit.
“Looking young is an essential part of the American Dream for women,” Pelosi contends in Fight Wrinkles, Not Foreign Wars, a controversial chapter in which the Speaker takes on President Obama and his Afghanistan war.
Pelosi believes that hundreds of billions of dollars being spent to kill innocent Muslims overseas should be diverted to providing “on-demand” wrinkle removal surgeries for poor women of color, especially those who speak no English and are in America illegally.
Pelosi proudly admits that the health care reform bill passed by the House provides unlimited botox and cosmetic surgery for twenty million old hags that are denied the opportunity to look young because of racism and bigotry.
Covering those twenty million hags under the public option advocated by Pelosi would significantly reduce the cost of being beautiful in America and would take a huge chunk out of the federal deficit as well, according to the Speaker.
Summary: A good read for those who enjoy the rants and raves of a mediocre mind devastated by botox poisoning. Not recommended for those with known self-esteem problems or a history of mental issues.
