AP Rushes in to Calm Jitters Among Climate Change Devotees As Rains Soak California!

Satire by John W. Lillpop

The heavens literally opened up this week in California as it rained, rained, rained, and rained even some more as the Creator sponsored an elaborate advertising pitch for Morton’s Sale and against climate change mythology:

The deity theme: “When It Rains It Pours!”

The unexpected, unseasonable, and unlikely wet stuff sent climate change devotees and global warming scam artists scampering for cover as the Golden State struggled to avoid floods and other natural disasters which ensue when Mother Nature releases excess liquids from on high.

Fearing yet another massive publicity wound to the tenuous integrity of the climate change crowd, left-wing journalists, including the Omni-present Associated Press, sought to soothe ravaged nerves by reminding anti-science weasels on the left that a week of scattered rain drops simply cannot undo years of environmental abuse at the hands of white conservative males.

That would be as silly as claiming that you can add 30 million uninsured people to the ranks of the insured while cutting overall health care costs.


As reported:

LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Residents in three California foothill communities headed home Sunday after a powerful storm that threatened to unleash mud on neighborhoods beneath unstable hills scarred by recent wildfires.

With the storm reduced to sprinkles, residents in the Los Angeles County cities of Glendora and Azusa were allowed back into their homes. Monrovia residents were allowed back late Saturday, officials said.

The storm - the largest since 2010 - kept emergency planners and rescue crews busy, but it didn't produce enough rain to pull California out of a crippling drought that has grown to crisis proportions for the state's vast farming industry.

The precipitation will bring the Los Angeles region to about half its normal rainfall for the season, Bill Patzert, a climatologist for the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in La CaƱada Flintridge, told the Los Angeles Times
"This is no drought-buster, but it's a nice, fat down payment" in the water bank, he said.”

And thank you for those reassuring words, Mr. Patzert.

Viva climate change fraud!