Satire by John W. Lillpop
In what might be considered a fairly good week by some, Herman Cain finally discovered, wittingly or not, how to turn off the Gloria Allred harassment machine. As astute observers have noted, a full week has gone by since some weeping willow crawled out from under a rock with the dreary Allred in tow to allege that Cain made a gesture or spoke a word(s) that made the dame in question “uncomfortable,” which is a criminal act if committed by a black dude against a white femme in some states too close to the Mason-Dixon line.
Cain’s secret: Again, unwittingly or not, the Black Walnut discovered that revealing all he knows about foreign policy is almost guaranteed to drive Allred et. al, off the BREAKING NEWS headlines and front pages of the instruments run for the DNC by mainstream media.
The trick is to simply say something really bizarre or stupid.
For example, Cain knocked lord knows how many floozies off their games by suggesting that China does not have nuclear weapons.
That dilly sent Gloria Allred into a dither just as she was putting the finishing touches on a nation-wide teleconference call that would bring all of Cain’s accusers together for one group sob-athon to whine and bitch about the horrors of being made ‘uncomfortable’ by a Pizza King of African descent!
Cain’s next ploy was to go ‘brain dead’ during an interview in which he was questioned about Barack Obama’s policy in Libya. Again, his answer so shocked the political world that Gloria Allred could have held a news conference in the altogether and she would not have drawn a crowd, excepting only perhaps the “Pin Head” segment on the Bill O’Reilly comedy hour.
Sensing that he had the sawed-off old hag just where he wanted her, Cain went for Allred’s throat and the kill by saying that kicking the Taliban out of Libya would lead to lasting peace in the middle-east.
By the time that gaffe had finished reverberating, Gloria Allred had conceded defeat and was last seen hitchhiking a ride back to Los Angeles!
What might be next for the very transparent Herman Cain? How about, “What Is the Cuban Word for Uzbekistan?”
You go, Herman Cain!
