31.12.09

Moon Bats Mourn News about Rush Limbaugh










Satire by John W. Lillpop

For the briefest of moments this morning, left wing nut balls all across America got a head start on the celebrations and hell –raising slated to ring in the New Year at midnight.

Liberal spirits were boosted by news from that on-line leftist rag, Wikipedia, which excitedly announced the demise of Rush Limbaugh on the island of Oahu, where, incidentally, Barack Obama was NOT born.

Champagne bottles were prematurely uncorked, noise makers and confetti went free for the taking at DNC branches, and Harry Reid declared that Rush’s passing was about 50 years too late.

Not a dry eye was to be found as moon bats from coast-to-coast cried with unrestrained joy at the Wikipedia breaking news.

El Rushbo was no more!

Then came the tragic news from Oahu: Not only had Rush survived, but now the bloke was resting comfortably and was expected to be back on the air as scheduled next week!

Dark, deep down depression among the left was the inevitable response.



Shrieker of the House Nancy Pelosi left her $10,000 a night bungalow in Kona on the “Big Island” long enough to try to cheer up dispirited moon bates.

Said she, “This would not have happened if ObamaCare had been in place. We would have recognized the name and would have ordered an immediate stop to all treatment, including assisted breathing. This we would have done for the children, the poor, and the hopeless.”

Pelosi also reminded her audience that Limbaugh had all the symptoms of a heart attack which, as she put it, “gives us all hope for a better outcome in 2010!”

Tall, Dark, and Handsome—but Hardly Presidential















By John W. Lillpop

For nigh unto three years, Barack Obama has cajoled, charmed, and captivated scores of millions of naive people throughout the world, including most of the mainstream media, into believing that he, and he alone, has the answers to the many problems that befuddle America and all of the world for that matter.

Almost from the beginning, Obama succeeded in ‘running a thrill up and down the legs’ of liberals looking for a black hero and antidote to W. and the right.

For example, this from the October, 2006 San Francisco Chronicle:

“The cameras almost never stopped clicking and flashing. Obama, who is lean, strikingly handsome and easy with his incandescent smile, joked that he'd have to ice his arm down after the book signings.”

Just to show that Obama was more than just a pretty face in an empty suit, the Chronicle threw in this quote from The One:

"When the American people pay attention, good things happen," he said in his short speech. "Our instincts are good." Obama said people were tired of the "slash and burn" style of politics of recent years and are searching for "common values and common ideals."

“The country, he said, "is in a serious mood."

Mind you, this was before Obamamania had taken root in the minds and souls of millions of folks who would stand all agog in his presence while a choir of heavenly angels trumpeted his every utterance.

This was before CHANGE became the defining word in a presidential campaign, although the intent was never really explained or defined.

Over the ensuing months, Obama took on the best qualities of JFK, Martin Luther King, and Jesus Christ, while morphing into a clean and articulate black brother, a rarity if Joe Biden is to be believed.

The American people bought into the Obamamania created by the mainstream media and elected him to serve as president of the United States.

Eleven months after the inauguration of Barack Obama as the 44th American President, a new reality has emerged:

He may be Tall, Dark, and Handsome—but Barack Obama is hardly Presidential!

Book of the Decade: Nancy Pelosi’s, Going Rouge


Satire by John W. Lillpop

While the media and leftist pundits were preoccupied with trashing Governor Sarah Palin and her fabulously successful Going Rogue, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi actually produced the book of the decade.

Speaker’s Pelosi’s autobiography, appropriately titled Going Rouge, went largely unnoticed, which is why this columnist is proud to offer this review as a demonstration of fair and balanced thinking.

While Governor Palin’s book is a rehashing of mundane political experiences from the 2008 presidential campaign, Pelosi’s work is more intellectually stimulating as it is describes the economic, social, and physical challenges that the most powerful woman in America faces in her never-ending fight to clean a House cluttered with corruption by folks named Rangel, Jefferson, and Kennedy, to name but a few.

All with (D) next to their names, we should add.

Pelosi provides a fascinating, but heartbreaking, account of her daily regime which requires her to get out of bed at 5AM in order to complete her “rouge routine” which takes hours to complete.

All of which Pelosi attributes to stress brought on by the Culture of Corruption she inherited from Republicans in 2007.

While Going Rouge is billed as a non-partisan, non-political work, Pelosi does stray a bit when it comes to promoting the trillion dollar health care reform bill that recently passed the House.

According to Pelosi, all women have an inalienable, constitutional right to look as young as possible.

“Looking young is an essential part of the American Dream for women,” Pelosi contends in Fight Wrinkles, Not Foreign Wars, a controversial chapter in which the Speaker takes on President Obama and his Afghanistan war.

Pelosi contends that hundreds of billions of dollars are being wasted to kill innocent Muslims overseas. She believes those monies should be diverted to providing “on-demand” rogue consultations for poor women, especially those who speak no English and are in America illegally.

Pelosi proudly admits that the health care reform bill passed by the House provides unlimited funds for botox and cosmetic surgery, although the provision is tucked away in an obscure part of the bill and in very small print.

Summary: A good read for those who enjoy the rants and raves of a mediocre mind devastated by botox poisoning.

30.12.09

Dick Cheney: A Voice of Reason among Vipers and Fools!


By John W. Lillpop


Granted, Dick Cheney is not a cool rock-star dude who oozes charisma and charm from every pore of his being.

Rather, he is a balding, bespectacled, overweight, 60-something multi-millionaire who just happens to be very conservative.

Besides being photographically and PC challenged, Dick Cheney has the heart of a lion—a very, very sick lion!

Above all else, Dick Cheney is a dedicated American patriot who sincerely gives a damn about America and the future of our great nation.

He has the guts and fortitude to ‘tell it exactly like it is,” which he does with gusto when the subject is Barack Obama’s idiotic pandering to Muslim terrorists.

As reported at politico.com, (1), in part, Cheney was in firing on all cylinders in recent comments about our befuddled and confused president:

“Former Vice President Dick Cheney accused President Barack Obama on Tuesday of “trying to pretend we are not at war” with terrorists, pointing to the White House response to the attempted sky bombing as reflecting a pattern that includes banishing the term “war on terror” and attempting to close the Guantanamo Bay detention center.

“[W]e are at war and when President Obama pretends we aren’t, it makes us less safe,” Cheney said in a statement to POLITICO.

“Why doesn’t he want to admit we’re at war? It doesn’t fit with the view of the world he brought with him to the Oval Office. It doesn’t fit with what seems to be the goal of his presidency — social transformation — the restructuring of American society.”

Hooray for Dick Cheney for having the cajones to speak truth.

His words are like mana from heaven in an era dominated by vipers and fools.

Please continue to speak out, Mr. Vice President!


(1)Read more: http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1209/31054.html#ixzz0bC9bOGai

Searching for Answers: Why Did W. Invade Iraq Instead of Yemen?
















Satire by John W. Lillpop

One of the great unanswered questions surrounding the attempt to blow-up Flight 253 on Christmas Day is this: Just where in Hades was America’s Commander-in-Chief while the fate of western civilization was being decided in the skies over Detroit?

Where was our leader for those three drama-packed days?

Golfing? Swimming? Purchasing a $9 million mansion overlooking the pacific? Fund raising?

It turns out that “none of the above” is the correct answer.

In fact, this reporter has it on very high authority that within minutes of Farouk Abdulmutallab’s underwear malfunction on 253, President Obama had ordered a swat team of his best and brightest security professionals to conduct a comprehensive and objective inquiry into the burning question of the moment.

Namely, how can we blame Abdulmutallab’s vicious attack on W.?

Mind you, the BBAAC (Blame Bush at all Costs) team was also interested in learning how it was that Abdulmutallab managed to fool so many brilliant administration officials like Janet Napolitano.

Information as to exactly how the system had been gamed would, of course, be collected for future reference and inclusion in the Obama Presidential Library slated for construction at Mecca right after the 2012 elections.

Still, the primary focus was to find a credible way to pin yet another Obama failure on the hapless W.

For three long, pressure packed days and nights, Obama and his team searched relentlessly for even a smidgen of evidence that would link W. to the Al-Quaeda mess in Yemen.

Alas, much to Obama’s chagrin, the Blame Bush gambit was quietly quashed when it was confirmed that W. had never heard of the nation of Yemen, could not find Yemen on a map if his life depended on it, and actually thought Yemen was an Internet gambling site for wealthy Jews.

Only then did Obama admit that there had been a “catastrophic breach” within his administration.

Most media types assumed that the president was referring to the security lapse that allowed Abdulmutallab to get on to Flight 253 with explosives stitched into his underwear.

However, informed sources reveal that by “catastrophic breach,”
Obama was talking about the inability of his BBAAC team to nail W. for yet another disaster “inherited” by The One!

Dithering in Paradise

By John W. Lillpop

It was embarrassing enough when President Obama was unable to make a decision about the war in Afghanistan for months on end. As distressing as his dithering was to US military professionals, it must have been a source of great inspiration to our enemies on the ground in that war-on-terror ravaged nation.

Unfortunately, Obama outdid himself with his non-responsiveness to the terrorist attack attempted by Farouk Abdulmutallab on Flight 253 on Christmas Day.

For three whole days, the leader of the Free World went missing except for golfing, swimming, and indulgence in the many other temporal pleasures offered in paradise.

Heaven knows there is nothing wrong with taking a well-deserved rest in order to recharge the batteries, but Obama’s down time came at a critical moment when the American people needed to know that our Commander- in-Chief was engaged and on top of the situation.

We also deserved to know that the United States government was doing its level best to prevent murderous jackals like Abdulmutallab from inflicting any more damage on the abused metropolis of Detroit.

Somehow Janet Napolitano’s mindless declaration that the “system worked” did not provide much comfort to a nation growing increasingly wary about the judgment and leadership of our president.

Harkening back to the days of 9.11, Americans expected to see our president with megaphone in hand, shouting “Let’s roll!” or some other banality designed to calm jittery nerves on the second most important holiday in the Christian faith.

Instead of being a war-ready Commander-in-Chief, Obama became poster boy for the Hawaii Chamber of Commerce and the tourist industry.

Leis, not bullets! Talk over shock and awe.

Obama’s latest failure forces a serious question that must be answered quickly.

Namely, can Barack Hussein Obama be trusted with the nuclear codes needed to defend 350 million Americans?

29.12.09

Nappy’s “System Worked” Faux Pas Not Uncommon in ObamaLand

By John W. Lillpop

Placing America’s Homeland Security in the hands of Janet Napolitano makes about as much sense as hiring Jack the Ripper to escort beautiful, young, vulnerable ladies through the thick fog after midnight.

Or trusting Iran’s Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to safeguard a Holocaust museum against anti-Semitic inspired vandalism and graffiti tagging.

Or hiring Bill Clinton to lecture newly weds on the importance of maintaining sexual fidelity in order to achieve marital bliss.

Napolitano’s latest air head moment came when she declared that the “system worked” perfectly in the case involving Farouk Abdulmutallab’s attempt to blow up Flight 253 into Detroit on Christmas Day.

Using her perverted logic, one could argue that the system worked perfectly on 9.11, given the fact that nineteen Muslim radicals were unable to crash into the White House, and all were removed from the ranks of active Jihadists forever.

“You are doing a heck of a job, Nappy!” would be an appropriate analogy reminiscent of W.’s praise for Michael Brown as New Orleans was drowning in the aftermath of hurricane Katrina.

However, Napolitano’s clueless statement is actually quite consistent with the drivel that flows out of this Obama White House on an almost daily basis.

For instance, when Barack Obama signed the trillion dollar stimulus package, he promised that it would deliver 3-4 million new jobs and prevent unemployment from exceeding eight percent.

Several months later, when unemployment jumped to 10.2 percent as the economy continued to lose jobs, Obama incredulously argued that the stimulus worked “as planned.”

Worked as planned?

Clearly, Obama and Napolitano are supping from the same polluted Kool-aid!

Aloha! to the America We Know and Love?













By John W. Lillpop

(Honolulu)- In a desperate attempt to soothe, at least momentarily, the brutal wounds to his person inflicted by post-partisan America over the past eleven months, President Obama sought refuge in the healing sun and surf of Oahu.

He was beckoned by the Aloha Spirit and a culture that not only tolerates dithering as a lifestyle choice, but actually encourages it.

Surely, a robust inventory of Mai-Tai cocktails and wiggling one’s toes in the warm sands at Waikiki Beach would provide a much needed respite from the horrors of health care reform, the war in Afghanistan, out-of-control federal deficits, and, most ominously, his sharp decline among fellow Democrats and Independents.

Hawaii called, and Obama answered by shouting out Mele Kaliki Maka in his best Hawaiian. All was well.

That is, until Farouk Abdulmutallab decided to stage a free, one-person Christmas Day fireworks show while flying into Detroit on Flight 253.

Abdulmutallab’s rude Christmas present interrupted Obama’s luxury bathing in the dreamy trade winds of Honolulu, and forced the president to face the bitter cold reality that inevitably comes with presidential power.

After burying his head in the sand for what an eternity, the president finally showed up and issued the obligatory Commander-in-Chief statement:

"This was a serious reminder of the dangers we face and of the nature of those who threaten our homeland," Obama said of the incident aboard a Northwest Airlines flight from Amsterdam. "We do not yet have all the answers about this latest attempt, but those who would slaughter innocent men, women and children must know that the United States will do more than simply strengthen our defenses. We will continue to use every element of our national power to disrupt, to dismantle and defeat the violent extremists who threaten us.”

Unfortunately, the reality is that the Obama administration is more concerned with assuring that Abdulmutallab was read his Miranda rights and treated with PC kindness than in preventing the annihilation of America.

Which leads to the pertinent question: Will the Obama presidency mean Aloha! to the America we know and love?

Is Obama Up to Dealing with a “Production Line of Terrorists”?

By John W. Lillpop


Heading into 2010 after a dismal year in which our once great nation deteriorated precipitously under the leadership of a naïve community organizer and dedicated Marxist, Americans have cause to be afraid, very afraid, about the future.

If nothing else, the words of Farouk Abdulmutallab, the latest “Religion of Peace” devotee with mid-air mayhem on his mind, should send a chill up and down the backbone of every American who values life and liberty.

Abdulmutallab was quoted as saying, “I am one from a production line of terrorists that has been trained in Yemen by Al-Quaeda.”

His words are particularly disturbing in view of the fact that while Al-Quaeda continues to plot the annihilation of America, our naïve president spends his time making it easier for the terrorists to succeed.

From shutting down GITMO, to moving KSM and other murderous fiends to New York City for civilian trials, to abandoning Enhanced Interrogation Techniques, to apologizing for American leaders and policies while on Muslim soil, President Barack Obama has done absolutely nothing to protect America from an encore of 9.11 and may, if fact, be aiding and abetting the enemy in pulling off another attack.

The brutal truth is that by electing Barack Obama, America has installed the worst possible man to serve as Commander-in-Chief in these perilous times.

President Obama does not believe in American history or values. Which is why he urges CHANGE, change, and more change.

As the events of the past few days have shown, America does indeed need change: From the fairy tale, gooey eyed thinking of Obama and the pacifist left, back to the clenched fist, America first, shock and awe mentality of George W. Bush.

Now that is CHANGE America desperately needs!

28.12.09

Janet Napolitano: You Are More of a Threat Than an Al-Queda Terrorist If You--











Satire by John W. Lillpop


With terrorists once again flying the friendly skies of America on a regular basis,it seems appropriate to remind each other that our safety and security is in the hands of left-wing nut ball Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano.

She, it will be noted, is the first female terrorist to actually do harm to America.

How goofy is this woman? Well, Napolitano puts great credence into a recently unclassified government report that warns against the possibility of violence by "right-wing extremists."

According to unnamed sources close to Napolitano, you are a right wing extremist if you--

* Were born in the Deep South

* Believe that 9/11 was more serious than Watergate

* Wear an American flag in your lapel

* Knowingly listen to Rush Limbaugh

* Speak and write perfect English, but no Spanish

* Own more than two Bibles or one Confederate Flag

* Believe that Jesus Christ means eternal life

* Support the rule of law and maintenance of law and order

* Want America's borders secured

* Believe that Mexico is a foreign nation and Spanish a foreign language

* Thank God that the U.S. won both world wars

* Oppose affirmative action, abortion, same-sex marriage, and gun control

* Believe that fighting higher taxes is more patriotic than paying them

* Prefer "Patriot's Tea" to Obama Kool-aid

* Doubt that Islam is really a "Religion of Peace"

* Believe that a baby Jew born to a virgin 2009 years ago saved mankind from sin

* Send out Christmas cards

* Attend a Christian church on occasions other than Christmas and Easter.

* Sing the National Anthem with your hand over your heart

* Fly Old Glory on Flag Day and Independence Day

* Believe that preventing voter fraud is more important than empowering illegal aliens, felons, and the deceased with the vote

* Own a gun and ammunition.

* Favor the death penalty for brutal killers, but oppose abortion of innocent fetuses

* Miss WF Buckley, Ronald Reagan, and Richard Nixon

* Have read the Declaration of Independence, Bill of Rights, and U.S. Constitution more than once

* Believe that labor unions should be subjected to anti-trust laws.

* Have never committed adultery or had gay sex

* Drive a car built by an American car company in America

* Dispute the belief that the economic meltdown was worth it in order to open home ownership to more people of color

* Believe that the U.S. should spend more money on national defense than on foreign aid

* Suspect that Nancy Pelosi is dumber than a pound of recycled botox

* Mourn the 50 million fetuses that have been slaughtered since the Roe V. Wade ruling

* Pay a tithe or make a donation to any organized religion

* Are successful and prosperous and flagrantly show it

* Have never applied for food stamps or welfare

* Read the Wall Street Journal, George Will, Pat Buchanan, and Ann Coulter

* Watch FOX News

* Dislike Fidel Castro, Hugo Chavez and other communist dictators

* Know the words to "God Bless America" by heart

* Argue that global warming is little more than hot air circulated by liberals for "green" profit

* Want the UN out of America and America out of the UN


As it turns out, being a right wing extremist is exactly where most Americans should be, despite Janet Napolitano and the other pinko commies in Washington.

27.12.09

Politicians like Max Baucus Give Alcoholics Bad Name

By Satire by John W. Lillpop









Are you unable to comprehend just how ObamaCare managed to squeak through the Senate, that august body of deep thinkers and sober reflectors?

A clue may in the offing in the youtube.com video below which shows Democrat Max Baucus apparently snockered to the gills while extolling the virtues of commie health care on the floor of the Senate:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5Y9X5ggxzA

What a pity that the good Senator will have no recollection whatsoever of this impassioned plea. Unless, that is, we send him about one million e-mails with said youtube dilly attached.

The Baucus fiasco brings up a pet peeve of mine. Namely, why is it that every time a politician gets in trouble these days, he immediately pleads alcoholism and or drug addiction, enters a rehabilitation center, prays to God and family for forgiveness, and demands to be coddled like a helpless baby for years to come?

Although Baucus has not played the alcoholic card yet, he surely will, soon enough. He may even use his addiction to booze as an excuse when ObamaCare explodes into chaos, which should be sometime before the State of the Union.

Baucus’ case brings up a pressing question for the times: Where are all the honorable miscreants, the tough guys who quit drinking and using only when forced to as a result of slipping into in a substance-induced coma or blackout.

I am speaking of the salt of the earth types who think that “12-steps” is a field sobriety test administered by Smokey to see if one can walk twelve full steps, on his or her own, in a straight trajectory without losing consciousness.

I refer to those rugged individualists whose sole purpose in entering a rehabilitation center would be to transact underground, tax-free, business with addicts confined there.

By contrast, politicians like Max Baucus use rehabilitation centers as quasi-religious sanctuaries to buy enough time for their aberrant behaviors to be replaced as “Breaking News” items with more current offenses.

May we suggest a new Step 1 for the Senator? Resign your senate seat immediately. Do it for the children!

26.12.09

Unto Ye Is Born a Community Organizer, Come to CHANGE the World!









Satire by John W. Lillpop

August 4, 1961. A day that will live in infamy along with December 7, 1941 and September 11, 2001?

Or should America be celebrating the birth of Barack Hussein Obama with the same gusto, reverence, and passion reserved for Christmas?

Do we Americans need a new national holiday--Barackmas--to celebrate this most special birthday?

Under this tax and deficit neutral scheme, everyone would get August 4th off. A small $500 "gratitude fee" would collected by 2010 Census workers to pay for the frolicking.

If all of this sounds far fetched, please consider the following scrolls found in Mohamed Attah's safe deposit box at the Bank of Baghdad:


And He Shall Be Called Barack, The Anointed One:

"And it came to pass, in the appointed time, that a child was born unto a humble servant of Allah in a land called Kenya. And the assembled 72 virgin angels tended to the mother and child, and sang in unison in praise of Allah for blessing the Faithful with this most holy of beings.

"And the virgin angels saith unto his mother, "Take ye this new born, the most favored of Allah, to an island where trade winds blow and birth certificates are fungible.

"He shall be called Barack, which means the Anointed One, and his birthplace shall be recorded as Honolulu to protect Faithful Kenyans from the ravages of evil crusaders, who will be known as "birthers."

"His powers shall be great and he shall be called upon to deliver the Faithful from the ravages of a dyslexic cowboy from Texas who destroyed many Muslims in order to shield Zionist pigs from justice.

"That evil man is the anti-Allah who hides behind a Bush to escape exposure. He must be blamed for all manner of sin and Barack must be held blameless for all woes to visit America, the home of the unfaithful and the land of the fraud."

"The Anointed One shall bring with him a sword with which to slay the moguls of capitalism and free the unwashed masses from insurance companies, Wall Street tycoons, automobile corporations and other agents of tyranny, except for labor unions which shall be rewarded and encouraged to multiple in great numbers, Allah willing.

"His enemies will be many and powerful, but none shall prevail because the Anointed One shall own a filibuster majority in the US Senate and a formidable majority in the US House, Allah willing.

"The Anointed One shall reign over America for eight years, or until the US Treasury runs out of money, whichever comes first.

"Go ye, therefore, two by two and preach the Gospel of Barack near and far to all who would hear you. To those who would not abide you, shake the dust from your feet and report the incident to the nearest ACORN center.

"Declare the good news to all, being this: On this night in a lonely mud hut in Kenya, Allah delivered unto us a child to rebuke all that malarkey about a baby Jew birthed by a virgin come to save the world."

And his name shall be BARACK, and he shall be Allah's gift to the Faithful.

Amen and amen!"

Obama Emboldens Terrorists











By John W. Lillpop

When former President George W. Bush spoke to terrorists his message was simple and clear: We will hunt you down and kill you!

Period, end of story.

W’s “clenched fist” kept America safe for nearly eight years following the 9.11 attack.

Regrettably, since Barack Obama was sworn is at the 44th U.S. President, the message to terrorists is:

* Unclench your fists and let us talk

* Terrorists will be treated with the same dignity and politically correct manners afforded any American citizen

* Terrorists will be read their Miranda rights, provided with taxpayer-paid legal representation, and will be allowed to broadcast their anti-American, Jihad messages from the great media center that is New York City

* Terrorists are guilty of crimes which will be adjudicated in civilian courts rather than military tribunals, even for thugs like KSM who master-minded the 9.11 attack

* America is NOT a Christian nation—so fret not about your background in Islamofascism

* All things considered, 9.11 was justifiable and understandable. Let’s talk.

Obama’s unilateral unclenching of America’s mighty fist does not seem to have resonated.

In just eleven months, a Muslim at Fort Hood has killed thirteen fellow soldiers. And an Al-Quaeda devotee tried to blow up an airplane headed to Detroit.

In addition, nothing has been done to address Iran and its drive toward nuclear weapons.

President Bush kept us safe for almost eight years; Obama has squandered home land security in order to pacify leftists who continue to operate under the illusion that Islam is a Religion of Peace.

Moonbats who voted for Obama need to answer a fundamental question: Is America safer today than it was before noon on January 20, 2009


Period, end of story.

23.12.09

The Eve before X-mas in the Senate




























Satire by John W. Lillpop


‘Twas the morn of the eve before Xmas and all through the Senate,
Liberals schemed to communize health care, none was repentant;

On Lieberman, Landrieu and Nelson, exclaimed Harry Reid;
We must save Obama’s tush, there is more cash if we need;

Woe Unto to all, the president’s disapproval is 56 percent,
We need 60 to save his ass and our party, known as the Big Tent;

Cast aside differences about abortion and other silly fights;
Do it now brethren and sisters, we must defeat the right;

Fret not about what home folks do and and what they might say,
Most are uniformed ninnies who can be bought to see things your way

Should your sense of right and wrong distract you my friends,
Let’s not get foolish, lest our elitist privilege abruptly end

Vote Yes for ObamaCare and do it with glee;
After all it is X-mas, and being on the losing side is not pretty

Obama needs your help in the season of giving,
Vote Yes on ObamaCare to stay among the healthy and living!

22.12.09

CHANGE Phobia Drives Harry Reid over the Top

By John W. Lillpop

For nearly two years, Barack Obama and the left have been relentless in insisting that CHANGE was essential in order to restore the American Dream to this great land.

Without providing substance or elaboration, Obama used the CHANGE mantra as a rallying cry to steal the U.S. presidency along with voter fraud provided by ACORN volunteers, voter intimidation courtesy of the New Black Panther Party, and $750 million dollars extorted from lord knows who or what.

However, now that Obama and fellow Marxists own the White House and both chambers of Congress, the whole notion of CHANGE has somehow lost its magical luster and sex appeal.

In fact, when it comes to health care, moon bats in the U.S. Senate now think that change should be forbidden.

So much for the “Will of the People,” huh, Harry?

As reported at the weeklystandard.com, in part: (1)

“Senator Jim DeMint (R-S.C.) pointed out some rather astounding language in the Senate health care bill during floor remarks tonight. First, he noted that there are a number of changes to Senate rules in the bill--and it's supposed to take a 2/3 vote to change the rules. And then he pointed out that the Reid bill declares on page 1020 that the Independent Medicare Advisory Board cannot be repealed by future Congresses:

“There's one provision that I found particularly troubling and it's under section c, titled "limitations on changes to this subsection."
And I quote -- "it shall not be in order in the senate or the House of Representatives to consider any bill, resolution, amendment, or conference report that would repeal or otherwise change this subsection."

“This is not legislation. It's not law. This is a rule change. It's a pretty big deal. We will be passing a new law and at the same time creating a senate rule that makes it out of order to amend or even repeal the law.

“I'm not even sure that it's constitutional, but if it is, it most certainly is a senate rule. I don't see why the majority party wouldn't put this in every bill. If you like your law, you most certainly would want it to have force for future senates.

“I mean, we want to bind future congresses. This goes to the fundamental purpose of senate rules: to prevent a tyrannical majority from trampling the rights of the minority or of future congresses.”

So now the party that regards the U.S. Constitution as a “living document,” subject to change as needed to conform to contemporary morals and values, wants to lock in a health care reform bill that nearly 60 percent of Americans oppose.

And they have the gall to call themselves “progressive”?



(1)

http://www.weeklystandard.com/Weblogs/TWSFP/TWSFPView.asp#14552

Advice for Obama on Health Care: “When You Come to a Fork in the Road, Take It!”

By John W. Lillpop

Although recent news concerning ObamaCare has generally been to the president’s liking, that may change dramatically after the senate has officially approved its 2,000+ page monster and said monster is scheduled for reconciliation with the equally goofy and bloated House version.

As former New York Yankee catcher Yogi Berra once observed, “It ain’t over ‘till its over!” Yogi was talking about a baseball game, but the same admonition may apply to health care reform as well.

The level of dissatisfaction for both bills, from both the left and right, is palpable. Changes that would involve abortion, the public option, and other hot button issues could push the entire mess into a sink hole on Capitol Hill.

And Maxine Waters may play a pivotal role in ending Obama’s foolish fairy tale. As reported on thehill.com, in part: (1)


“One of the public option's most vocal supporters in the House on Monday stressed she and her colleagues would fight "as hard as we possibly can" to ensure its inclusion in the final healthcare bill.

”The government plan is sure to be one of the most difficult debates to resolve once House and Senate lawmakers confer and combine their bills early next year. But Rep. Maxine Waters (D-Calif.) made clear last night that other liberal Democrats would not accept the Senate's decision to strip its bill of both the public option and a proposed expansion of Medicare.

"A lot of us will be fighting and encouraging our conferees to hold tight for the public option," she told MSNBC. "We haven't given up on that. That's extremely important to a lot of people — not just Democrats, but I mean Americans throughout this country.”

Meanwhile, the abortion language in the senate version of ObamaCare may bring the House of Cards down to earth with a huge crash. As also reported, in part, at the hill.com (2):

“House Democrats who oppose abortion rights "will find it very difficult" to support the Senate's healthcare bill, Rep. Bart Stupak (D-Mich.) warned Tuesday.

”Stupak, the author of an amendment to the House healthcare bill that would forbid federal subsidies from supporting insurance plans that cover abortion, said that he and the 63 other Democrats who supported that amendment were skeptical of the Senate's language on abortion.

"They know that the 64 Democrats who voted with the Republicans on my amendment, we feel strongly that we cannot support a healthcare bill which goes past the current restrictions, which is no federal funding for abortion," Stupak said on Fox News, referring to Democratic leaders in the House.

“Stupak, who has said the Senate's language on abortion is "unacceptable," warned that the Senate's provision and other elements of the bill could cost Democrats support for final passage of health reform in the House.

Sell-out Senator Ben Nelson has also signaled that his YEA vote for the bill would be in serious jeopardy should the Pelosi abortion fanatics succeed in tinkering with the language that finally sealed the deal for him.

All of this back and forth bickering between Democrats is going to provide a significant test of Obama’s ability to cajole, heal, and lead.

Another Yogi Berra truism may be helpful to our befuddled president: “When you come to a fork in the road, take it!”



(1)http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/73313-rep-waters-house-liberals-to-put-up-tough-public-option-fight


(2) http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/73389-stupak-house-abortion-rights-foes-may-oppose-senate-bill

Frequently Asked Questions about ObamaCare

Satire by John W. Lillpop

Moon bats who voted for Barack Obama are obviously delighted that the U.S. Senate is so close to approving ObamaCare, perhaps as early as Christmas Eve.

However, many are confused and do not realize that the House and Senate must reconcile any differences before a final bill can be submitted to the president. Others are not informed as to the effective dates and coverage terms.

The following list of Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) was hacked from DNC computers and shows the answers that Democrat voters are being fed:



Q: My next health insurance premium is due on January 5, 2010. Should I pay it, or will Obama handle it for me?

A: Registered Democrats and Independents who voted for ‘Bama are automatically covered as of 1/1/2010. President Obama has requested that instead of wasting more money on insurance premiums, these folks should make a generous, tax-deductible contribution to the Democrat party. Write “Ben Nelson-Mary Landrieu payoffs” on your check.

Registered Republicans and Independents who voted for John McCain will not be covered under ObamaCare until their 65th birthday or five years following the president’s signature, whichever comes first. Such people must continue to pay their overpriced premiums or risk a $5,000 annual fine and five years in jail.


Q: I am an illegal alien from Latin America who desperately needs transsexual surgery to align my sexual plumbing with my natural urges and instincts. I am bilingual, but only in Spanish and Mexican.

Am I covered, and when can I trade my useless penis for replacement parts that will set me free?


A: Good news, Pedro! As it turns out, you are covered as of 1/1/2010, just like the dopey American citizens who will end up paying for your switch.

To qualify, simply provide proof of your illegal alien status to the attending surgeon at least twenty minutes before anesthesia is administered.

One word of caution: Do not speak even a single word of English. Doing do may disqualify you immediately.


Q: I am eight plus months pregnant with twin boys. The father and I are not married and we have agreed that I will get an abortion. From a financial view, should we have the abortion in 2009 or wait until 2010?

A: We cannot dispense medical advice, but recommend that you ask your physician if he or she can guarantee that your brats will not pop out before January 1, 2010.

If premature delivery is not a risk, we advise waiting until mid-January to nuke the brats. By doing so, you will automatically qualify for the ObamaCare late-term rebate, which can save you thousands!

Q: Mother is 54 years old and in need of bypass heart surgery. She is still very active in GOP politics including her role as a top fundraiser for Sarah Palin. What are her options under ObamaCare?

A: We recommend that Mum apply for assisted suicide in a state where that procedure is legal, but wait until after January 1. Good news: Legal assisted suicide is fully covered (no co-pay) for Republicans and Independents who voted for McCain.


There you go! The Democrat party looking out for the little guy as always!

21.12.09

How Would Senator Barack Obama Vote?

By John W. Lillpop

Pretend for a moment that George W. Bush had pushed legislation that would reform health care and provide insurance for 30 million people, not necessarily Americans, without coverage.

Suppose also that W.’s plan contained the following “flaws” from the liberal perspective:

( ) No “robust” public option

( ) Restrictions on abortion rights, even if just slightly

( ) Was seen as a gift to health care insurers

What sort of reaction would have W.’s plan have drawn from Democrats in the U.S. House and Senate?

In particular, how would the young, bright and very liberal junior senator from the great state of Illinois have reacted?

Would Senator Obama have gritted his teeth and rallied behind W. in order to advance the common good?

Would Senator Obama have used his legendary oratory skills to encourage liberals to set aside petty partisan bickering long enough to bring hope to the unwashed masses, even if it meant enhancing W.’s image?

Or would Senator Obama withhold his consent until an appropriate concession was forthcoming for the good people of Illinois? Perhaps getting W. to agree to shutdown GITMO in order to move the vicious killers housed there to Thompson, Illinois in order to bring jobs and prosperity to the land of Lincoln?

Truth is Senator Obama would have been among the most vocal in demeaning W. and the Republicans for cavorting with the evil moguls of the capitalist-infested insurance industry.

He would have been joined by the likes of Harry Reid and other left-wing extremists who would have even accused W. and the Republicans of rampant racism on a par with the party’s duplicity in opposing the abolition of slavery 160 years ago.

Which exposes the real motivation behind the Democrat obsession with ObamaCare:

It has nothing to do with health care and everything to do with a 44 percent presidential approval rating and bass-ackwards thinking which holds that ramming an unwanted and unneeded federal bureaucracy down the throats of a dubious public will salvage The One’s failed presidency.

ObamaCare will do no such thing, which is about the only good thing that can be said about this idiotic violation of public trust and common sense.

20.12.09

Is President Obama More Pitiful Than Scornful?

By John W. Lillpop

President Obama’s arrogant demeanor and tendency to talk down to people has made him an easy man to dislike and, some would say, even hate.

However, a new dynamic is at play here: Obama has shown raw incompetence on a scale never witnessed before in an American president, including the much-maligned George W. Bush.

Although Bush was adept at butchering the English language to the point of being nearly undecipherable, he was never guilty of down right stupidity.

Think about it.

W. never:

Signed a trillion-dollar “stimulus” without reading or understanding the bill. Nor did W. compound the foolishness by promising that the unread bill would create 3-4 million jobs

Accepted a Nobel Peace prize right after announcing a major deployment of American troops on foreign soil

Announced closure of a terrorist holding camp (GITMO) without the slightest idea about where to send hundreds of deadly killers

Appointed a tax cheat to head the U.S. Treasury, a post that oversees the IRS

Accused a police officer who was simply doing his job of “acting stupidly” without knowing the circumstances involved

Allowed the U.S. Attorney General to drop very serious Vote intimidation charges against the New Black Panther Party

Lied about jobs created in order to make his stimulus mistake look less serious

Ridiculed Special Olympics children on national television

Made a fool of himself on two separate occasions in Copenhagen

Bowed before the King of Saudi Arabia and Emperor of Japan


It is no longer possible to respect President Barack Obama enough to scorn him. Alas, his incompetence cries out for pity!

Is Santa a Democrat or a Republican?










Satire By John W. Lillpop


While nearly everyone has weighed in with speculation as to the likely party affiliation of Jesus, not much has been written about Santa Clause.

Would the jolly old man be a Democrat or a Republican?

Consider Santa’s Democrat tendencies:

* Is a multilingual globalist

* Exploits children to enhance his public image and retain power

* Works just one night a year

* Hangs around with and employs fairies

* Illegally crosses U.S. borders every December 24th


Then, consider Santa’s Republican tendencies:


* Is a fat, old white guy who probably drinks too much and hates change

* Conspires with big business once a year to rip-off millions of average Americans

* Considers himself “compassionate” although he pays his elves far below minimum wage and no benefits

* Lives in a foreign land (North Pole) to avoid paying U.S. taxes

* Values the bottom line over the environment—think about all those reindeer droppings

Fact is, Santa seems split fairly evenly between Democrat and Republican. In that sense, the old boy reflects America almost perfectly!

Oh, Come Let Us Abort Him!









By John W. Lillpop



The wonder of Christmas is that it is about the most inspiring, beautiful story ever told.

The fact that an omnipotent Creator would deliver His plan of salvation for humanity through an innocent child is stunning.

After all, He could have used the enormous forces of nature to draw attention to his dissatisfaction with the spiritual shortcomings of those created in His image.

A major flood, a devastating string of earthquakes, killer diseases, or other deadly calamities could have been visited upon the earth to remind sinners of the urgent need to reconcile with their Maker.

Instead, He chose to deliver His message of hope and eternal life through a human instrument in the form of baby Jesus.

The world has never been the same.

Unfortunately, mortal men and women have since decided that some human life is not important enough to qualify for eternal life.

This arrogant denial of God’s greatest gift—human life—reached it’s apex in 1973, when the United States Supreme Court ruled that abortion was an inalienable right set forth in the United States Constitution.

Thus, the will of man was judged superior to that of the Creator. His will was ruled subservient to that of fallible humans.

This despite the fact that the U.S. Constitution was crafted by God-fearing men of faith who would be appalled to learn that their great work would be distorted and misrepresented in order to justify infanticide.

More than 50 million innocent fetuses have been destroyed in America since the death sentence was imposed on the unborn in 1973.

Abortions are “justified” by a variety of reasons, the inconvenience of a pregnancy being the least moral. In situations where a woman has been a victim of rape or incest, more plausible justifications are applied.

Regardless of justification, the fact is that 50 million human spirits have been destroyed through human, rather than divine, intervention.

Which means that the classic Christmas carol titled “Come, Let Us Adore Him,” has literally been changed to “Come, Let Us Abort Him.”

Oh, and if ObamaCare ever becomes law, the government will probably pick up the tab!

19.12.09

ObamaCare: Turning Wine into Water










By John W. Lillpop


Up until quite recently, brain dead liberals have persisted in arguing that Barack Obama is the modern day equivalent of Jesus Christ. The Savior with a Blackberry, a laptop and the nuclear codes, if you will.

However, whereas Jesus was able to upgrade a common element like water into wedding wine (see John 2:1-11), Obama’s miracles, to date, have been fatally flawed in the opposite direction.

For example, in February, our newly minted president signed the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009, which was supposed to convert one trillion dollars of hard earned taxpayer wealth into 3 to 4 million new and or saved jobs.

However, since Obama approved the so-called stimulus bill, the
American economy has continued to lose jobs with unemployment reaching a level not seen for almost three decades.

So much for the liberal stimulus, heh?

And although Obama’s failed program has not produced new jobs, it has driven the national deficit through the ceiling, even to the point of requiring a two trillion dollar increase to the federal debt ceiling.

Likewise, Obama’s imprudent, ill advised and foolish health care reform initiative which makes less sense the more one studies the details.

ObamaCare would replace what is unarguably the best health care system in the world with a Marxist HMO paid for by denying care to the old and life to the unborn. It would reward illegal aliens for breaking and entering America, thereby encouraging millions of illiterate peasants still south of our borders to migrate north for the freebies.

All of which shall be paid for by American cities.

Which proves that ObamaCare is all about turning wine into water!

'Don We Now Our Gay Apparel'?


























By John W. Lillpop

Most Christmas music provides a spiritual blessing to those who wish to commemorate the birth of Jesus Christ. It is uplifting, joyful, and celebratory in a world embroiled with cynicism and corruption.

There are exceptions.

For example, the lyrics to a favorite, Deck the Halls, include the following peculiar stanza:

Deck the halls with boughs of holly
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
'Tis the season to be jolly
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Don we now our gay apparel
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la


Not to be insensitive, but just what the hell is “gay apparel” and who is this “Don” dude?

Although I am no theologian, I urge parents to force their children to wear "straight" apparel, forget about this Don character, and avoid using undefined F words at Christmas!

No Offense Intended, But--






















By John W. Lillpop

Lord knows I am no flame-throwing anarchist who stumbles about saying and doing things only to irritate good people. That is not my modus operandi, regardless of what creditors and my ex-wife may be charging.

Nonetheless, it seems fitting at this time of year to “Cast My Fate to the Wind,” and to speak unabashed about that which I believe, without undue regard to political correctness.

As they used to say “Let it All Hang Out!”

Thus, and therefore, acting against the counsel of my lawyer and psychiatric team, I hereby plunge headfirst into the world of defiance and wicked decadence.

I do so by exclaiming the following greeting from the top of my keyboard:

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

And, no, I did NOT forget Kwanzaa, Hanukah, or Ramadan.

And I most assuredly did NOT mean Happy Holidays, the neutered, politically correct double talk that has gained favor with so many ACLU-bullied wussies.

And to be perfectly frank, in my view "Feliz Navidad" is the language of illegal aliens and, as such, is unacceptable as an American greeting!

I said exactly what I meant, without apologies or hesitation. I said it, and already I hear the manic screams of sirens outside my padded cell.

What to do?

The only thing a sane person would do. Repeat the “sounding joy” and again say:

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

And so it is.

18.12.09

Another “Bad Air Day” for The One in Copenhagen!

By John W. Lillpop

Barack Obama just cannot catch a break in Copenhagen, or so it seems.

On the heels of his mind-boggling humiliation at the hands of the IOC just weeks ago, our naive community organizer suffered another brutal day on the international stage while trying to convert hot air into green gold.

Never at a loss for words when it comes to exaggerating his own importance and accomplishments, Obama shoved the naked truth into submission and declared Victory, with a capital V!

“Unprecedented breakthrough” and “meaningful agreement” were the rich phrases words used by the president in describing his baby, which, as it turns out, is a non-binding verbal agreement that is hardly a breakthrough, and is unprecedented only in the amount of hot air and noxious fumes generated to make it sound meaningful.

Only a president with an approval rating of 44 percent would embrace such failure with such fanfare and attempt to con the American people into accepting it as a wondrous Christmas gift from a failed messiah.

Obama was buttressed by the presence of Hillary Rodham Clinton who offered to spread YOUR wealth to the poorest of nations, just for playing the silly leftist game called climate change management.

But Hillary only dropped $100 billion dollars in Copenhagen. Chump change to the leftists now running Congress, don’t you know?

Meanwhile, Shrieker Nancy Pelosi is headed back from Denmark in her private jumbo jet (hijacked from the Air Force) after declaring her trip and that of her closest 789 political allies to have been instrumental in bringing about Obama’s “Unprecedented breakthrough” and “meaningful agreement.”

When asked just why in the hell she went to Copenhagen to begin with, Pelosi reminded her interrogator that she was Speaker of the House and was under no obligation to take guff from Nazis, Astro-turf tea baggers, or flat-earth conservatives.

There you go, America. Our nation is drowning in a sea of debt, and the liberals send Obama, Hillary, and Pelosi to make nice with the likes of China, Hugo Chavez, and other renegades-- on our dime!

Diversity Must Be Respected in U.S. Senate!

John W. Lillpop

As 100 elitist men and women continue to debate the future of 350 million Americans and their health care in the United States Senate, a gross injustice is being perpetrated on scores of millions of people for whom English is a foreign language.

Specific reference is made to the 20 million or so illegal aliens in America who have a vital interest in the health care debate and in its ultimate resolution. Most people in the invading criminal demographic speak Spanish and little or no English whatsoever.

How is it that Harry Reid and other bleeding heart liberals in the Senate have been allowed to ignore illegal aliens by not requiring that the business of the Senate be conducted in bilingual fashion?

Senator Tom Coburn of Oklahoma championed the cause against lazy elected officials who refuse to read their trillion dollar mistakes before voting, but Coburn’s gutsy performance did not go nearly far enough.

In addition to reading important Amendments page by page as Sen. Coburn insisted, the most deliberative body on the planet must be forced to read all such documents in Spanish, Russian, Arabic, and Chinese, the later for those who will end up paying for the messes created.

Yes, of course, reading the documents in all of those languages will inevitably slow down the process. But after all, diversity is our greatest strength, right?

With any luck, Reid and his leftist buffoons can be restricted to reading, verbatim, the garbage he would like to dump on the American people until at least the mid-term elections in November, 2010.

Diversity above all else, Jose~!

17.12.09

What If The ACLU Had Existed Christmas Eve, 0000?



















Satire By John W. Lillpop

As we Americans struggle to preserve our rich cultural traditions surrounding Christmas, there are times when the struggle seems too hard, the load too heavy.

For example, one wonders if it is worth it upon hearing that another whacked-out liberal judge has determined that the nativity scene is unconstitutional.

Not just insensitive to non-Christians, mind you, but unconstitutional for heaven's sake!

Not so many years ago, the word unconstitutional was reserved for major injustices that really harmed people. Heinous acts like slavery or racial discrimination for example.

But times have changed.

Two years ago, we heard of a rabbi in Washington state who threatened to sue because of fifteen Christmas trees enjoyed by the overwhelming majority of the public at the Seattle airport. "Treeless in Seattle," was apparently this rabbi's passion.

But why would an alleged “man of faith” act to deny so many people the pleasure of seeing a simple, unobtrusive symbol just because the symbol did not immediately conjure up images of his particular faith?

How does one confront such narrow-minded, selfish, mean spirited thinking without going barking mad?

One way is to fantasize what the first Christmas might have been like if liberals and the ACLU had been in charge the night Jesus was born.

The Christmas story might have included nuttiness such as this:

Upon entering Bethlehem, Mary and Joseph would have been stopped by activists from Planned Parenthood. The unmarried couple would have been reminded of the growing problem with overpopulation, including demands on finite resources and added pollution.

Mary would have been encouraged to abort the unborn fetus, and Planned Parenthood would have offered to pay for the procedure with tax money stolen from the Romans.

Meanwhile, a corrupt liberal judge (aren't they all?) in Nazareth would have issued a restraining order to prevent the three wise men from entering the city where the Savior was born.

Citing the lack of any women, blacks, Asians, Hispanics, gays, transsexuals, Jihadists, or blind and handicapped Buddhists among the three wise acres, the judge would have given the trio twelve hours to submit an acceptable affirmative action plan, or be forced to leave the Holy land.

All mirth, gold and other gifts brought by the trio would have been impounded and stored in a local "Babies R Us" retail outlet, pending final disposition by the court.

That same judge would have also ordered Mary to submit to a full gynecological examination by a licensed physician to determine the veracity of her claim to be a virgin.

The judge would have ruled that this was essential to maintain the probative integrity of Nazareth's birth and death records, and to establish a basis for royalty payments owed Nazareth when the Jesus story was added to the Holy Bible.

ACLU Lawyers in Bethlehem would have sued the innkeeper who turned Mary and Joseph away. The suit would allege that there was, in fact, plenty of room at the inn, but that Mary was discriminated against solely because she was an unmarried, pregnant, middle-eastern woman of color who spoke perfect Yiddish, but not a word of Italian or French.

Even back then, being bilingual was seen as a mark of sophistication and economic stability by liberal nut cases.

Joseph would have been required to pay a special “Ass Transit Fee”—not a tax, mind you—owing to the fact that the donkey carrying the blessed Mary was not properly licensed in Bethlehem. The local tax collector was known in the underground as the “Ass Taxer,” a term that still applies to most American Democrats.

Joseph and Mary would have been forced to leave Bethlehem earlier than originally planned, because a local bureaucrat named Goreish had determined that their donkey was releasing unhealthy levels of toxic gases, indelicately called “farts” in our enlightened times.

Such emissions were thought to be a major factor in clinical depressions, and were also implicated in a phenomenon called “Global Cooling," which Goreish insisted would destroy the planet by the year 0010 unless immediate action were taken.

Goreish was so convinced of his science that he mass produced a scroll manuscript modestly titled, "Ten Inconvenient Truths about Global Cooling," which were sold on street corners for thirty pieces of silver, with tips gladly accepted.

Sadly, Goreish died penniless and humiliated in 0100 while trying to promote yet another doomsday rip off called "Global Warming." The animal rights activist presiding over the funeral for Goreish called him a huge and noble force for peace.

Because of scribing and typographical errors repeated over the course of 2,000 years, "noble force for peace" has become "Nobel Peace," an award recently accepted by the latest rip-off artist in the Goreish family tree.

Finally, a band of homeless Islamofascist gypsies would have been arrested for conspiring to destroy the Baby Jesus by placing a Muslim baby with a treatable, but contagious, disease into the manger immediately next to that of Jesus. This was the first recorded instance of Muslims using children on suicide missions to kill innocent Jews.

Of course, the arrested Islamofascists eventually sued for discrimination based on religious intolerance. And won!

Praise be to God that liberalism and the ACLU did not exist in their present form on Christmas Eve, 0000!

Liberals Abandon Christmas, Embrace Easter in December!

Satire by John W. Lillpop

Liberal loathing of the Christmas story is legendary and explains why the left is, and will forever be, out of touch with mainstream America.

However, liberal moon bats seem to have outdone even themselves with the latest blood-letting taking place in the Senate over the health care disaster commonly known as ObamaCare.

Indeed, it now appears as though the left has decided to replace Christmas with Easter in December, at least the Crucifixion part, that is.

As reported at Politico.com, in part:

“In a stunning reversal of fortune for President Barack Obama, top progressives are attacking the health-reform plan moving through the Senate as “hollow,” “unsupportable” and a sellout to corporate interests.

“Republicans, after plotting for months to sink the signature legislation of Obama’s first year, suddenly think that Democrats might wind up doing it for them.

“Most dangerously for White House chances of assembling 60 Senate votes, former Vermont Gov. Howard Dean launched a third day of attacks on the emerging bill, arguing in a Washington Post op-ed that it meets none of his benchmarks for “real reform.”

“[A]s it stands, this bill would do more harm than good to the future of America,” Dean wrote, then took to the airwaves to amplify his case."

No longer convinced that Barack Hussein Obama is anything more special than your garden variety Chicago mobster, sans the mean-spirited cajoles needed for the job, liberal lunatics like Howard Dean, Keith Olbermann, and Markos Moulitsas, founder of Daily Kos, are calling for the scalp of the man who was once seen as the world’s redeemer by liberals from coast-to-coast.

All of which makes for terrific entertainment and seasonal joy, to say nothing of saving the republic trillions of dollars in taxpayer money that would have been wasted on yet another stupid liberal bust.

With nut balls like Olbermann and Dean on the Easter patrol, know of a certainty that the Crucifixion will take place.

In high doubt, however, are prospects for any sort of robust resurrection!

Force Senate to Read all 2,000+ Pages of Health Care Monster!







By John W. Lillpop

Americans fed up with elected representatives who refuse to read legislation that commits taxpayers trillions of dollars before voting for such bills, have found a new friend in the Senate.

He is Sen. Tom Coburn, R-Okla., a conservative’s conservative. He is also a physican who knows more about health care than all 60 of his dishonorable opponents on the other side of the aisle combined.

The good doctor did a truly good deed on Wednesday by forcing the clerk of the Senate to read all 767 pages of an amendment to the health care bill, said amendment offered by Senator Bernie Sanders.

Dr. Coburn’s procedural manuever forced the edgy socialist from Vermont to withdraw his communist prattle from the floor, much to the relief of most thinking Americans.

Now, Dr. Coburn, why not do the same for the full bill itself, when and if that nonsense actually makes it to the floor?

Force Harry Reid and the far left to read every single word and we might be able to cutoff Obama’s folly long enough for the mid-term elections to take place, at which point Obama will be permanently relegated to lame duck status.

God Bless, Dr. Tom Coburn!

China Takes Action against U.S. for Exceeding Debt Ceiling











Satire by John W. Lillpop


As anyone who deals with the banking industry knows, the corrupt hyenas who were so quick to accept hundreds of billions of dollars in bail out funds are down right hostile when it comes to lending a helping hand to the very taxpayers who financed their fraud and deceit.

A favorite trick of credit card mercenaries is to unilaterally and indiscriminately reduce one’s credit line and then impose hefty fees and usury interest rates on those who exceed the new limits.

A catch 22, if ever there were one.

Unreliable sources have informed this reporter that the People’s Republic of China has joined the slime and sleaze ranks of U.S. bankers by taking action against Uncle Sam because Democrats have rung up the national debt in excess of the 12.1 trillion dollar limit.

China's President Hu Jintao is alleged to have sent President Obama the following memo via registered mail:


Mr. President Barack Obama
White House
Washington, D.C.

Greetings and salutations President Obama:

We are writing you to inform you that the People’s Republic of China has revised the terms of the credit notes issued to the United States of America as follows:

*Interest shall be assessed at an annual rate of 11.50 percent on all outstanding debt.

*Your credit line has been reduced by $750 billion dollars.

*All credit payments must be received by the first of each month. Late payments or uncollectible payments will result in a $50 billion fee which will be added to your outstanding balance, which may cause you to exceed your revised credit limit which will result in additional fees.

All changes effective immediately.

These changes are consistent with U.S. banking practices and are based on a recent report indicating that your administration, in concert with Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid, has exceeded your own national debt ceiling of $12.1 trillion dollars.

Our decision is final and no appeal is possible.

With best wishes for a prosperous new year, we the People of China thank you for your reckless and foolish abandonment of sound fiscal policies.

##$#$$$$,

President Hu Jintao

16.12.09

Pelosi “Promises” to Send Health Bill to Obama--Before SOU!


By John W. Lillpop


Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, the thrill of victory!

Speaker Nancy Pelosi has finally allowed a slight ray of truth to permeate her moon-bat existence, if ever so briefly.

Just weeks after “celebrating” passage of the most bloated, wrong-minded piece of communist prattle ever debated on U.S. soil, the Speaker was forced to face the cold, hard facts of reality:

The American people do not need or want her Marxist fingerprints on the greatest health care system in human history.

As reported at politico.com, in part:

“In the case of health care reform, Pelosi credited House Democrats with having saved Obama’s initiative after the onslaught of attacks during the August recess. And if the Senate can complete its bill this month, she will work to try to send a House-Senate compromise to the White House before the State of the Union.”

In other words, the Speaker and her Democrat colleagues cannot deliver the goods—make that the bads—for the Marxist now occuping the Oval Office.

An early, but pleasant, Christmas surprise for one and for all Americans!

Given the Speaker’s tendency to drift away from reality, one wonders if she fully appreciates the fact that the 2010 SOU will almost certainly be her last as Speaker of the House!

Even more cause for decking the halls and donning straight apparel!

Urgent Need to Counter One Million Calls from Moon Bats!

By John W. Lillpop

From behind enemy lines, came this missive concerning health care reform:

----- Forwarded Message ----
From: "Jen O'Malley Dillon, Democrats.org"
To: John lillpop
Sent: Wed, December 16, 2009 1:47:33 PM
Subject: Fwd: One million calls
John --

We've been fighting for health reform for decades. Now it's within reach.

Democratic senators across the country are currently fighting hard alongside the President to pass reform. They deserve our appreciation. Others are still trying to score partisan points rather than stand up for American families -- and they need to understand that their constituents demand better.

Please read the email below and help us hit one million calls to Congress since August in support of reform today.

Thanks,

Jen


My response:

"Democratic senators across the country are currently fighting hard alongside the President to pass reform"

Really? Nelson? Lieberman?

Did you hear Howard Dean's rant--he called for scrapping the monstrosity in the Senate?

Nancy Pelosi says she hopes to have a bill in Obama's Marxist hands before the SOU!

Face it--health care is dead. As is global warming.

Prepare for your return to minority status.

15.12.09

The Wandering Jew of Health Care Reform Strikes Again!


By John W. Lillpop


Will he or won’t he?

Yes he will! Wait a moment, we have an update: No he will not!

On and on it goes with Senator Joe Lieberman who, all by his lonesome, has added a few thousand strands of graying hair to the scalp of President Obama and turned Majority Leader Harry Reid into even more of a basket case.

Of course, the issue is health care reform. And the gentleman from Connecticut has vultures (Democrats) in the Senate positively freaked out with his on and off and off and on gyrations concerning the proposed ruination of the finest health care system in the entire world.

The latest, as of a little after noon EST today, has Brother Joe back in the fold and willing to support ObamaCare, PROVIDED that the Medicare expansion provision, which just last Sunday was hailed as a major break through orchestrated by virtue of the rare intellect of Harry Reid, is out.

As reported at yahoonews.com, in part:

“WASHINGTON – Independent Connecticut Sen. Joe Lieberman says he expects to support the Democrats' health care legislation as long as any government-run insurance plan stays out of the bill.

“Lieberman has been a question mark on the health care legislation for months. To win him over, Senate leaders said late Monday they were backing away from a Medicare expansion Lieberman opposed. They already had dropped a full-blown government insurance program.”

With the wandering Jew finally in tow, one would expect Democrats to be dancing with glee, right?

Well, not exactly. The concession needed to snare Lieberman has set off the Dean of Democrat moon bats, also known as Howard Dean, who now supports a fascist solution through imposition of the reconciliation procedure.

As reported, in part, at whorunsgov.com:

“In a blow to the bill grinding through the Senate, Howard Dean bluntly called for the bill to be killed in a pre-recorded interview set to air later this afternoon, denouncing it as “the collapse of health care reform in the United States Senate,” the reporter who conducted the interview tells me.

“Dean said the removal of the Medicare buy-in made the bill not worth supporting, and urged Dem leaders to start over with the process of reconciliation.”

“The gauntlet from Dean — whose voice on health care is well respected among liberals — will energize those on the left who are mobilizing against the bill, and make it tougher for liberals to embrace the emerging proposal.

In an excerpt, Dean reportedly states:

“This is essentially the collapse of health care reform in the United States Senate. Honestly the best thing to do right now is kill the Senate bill, go back to the House, start the reconciliation process, where you only need 51 votes and it would be a much simpler bill.”

“Dean essentially said that if Democratic leaders cave into Joe Lieberman right now they’ll be left with a bill that’s not worth supporting.”

Once again, Democrats have shown incompetence and ineptness on a scale that renders them totally incapable of running a political party, much less an entire nation!

Last Noel for Marxist Elitists?

By John W. Lillpop

What a difference seven months of liberal incompetence in the hands of Obama-Pelosi-and Reid can yield!

Just last May, James Carville, Democrat savant from the swamps of Louisiana, gazed into his crystal ball and saw forty years of unhindered Marxism in America’s future.

Refusing to consider the fact that Obama’s election, and that of Democrat majorities in both houses, was but an aberration, a mental breakdown of the American electorate induced by ACORN voter fraud, hatred for George W. Bush, a massive sell-out by the mainstream media, and far too much campaign cash for any Kenyan Democrat from Illinois to be trusted with, Carville put pen to paper and out driveled, 40 More Years: How the Democrats Will Rule the Next Generation.

As reported, in part, at examiner.com, Carville’s chortling was bitter bile for conservatives still nursing open wounds from the November 4, 2008 mass suicide committed by more than 69 million Americans:

“Democratic political strategist James Carville has cold words for The Republican Party as it struggles to recover from massive losses in election 20008. In his new book, 40 More Years: How the Democrats Will Rule the Next Generation, according to Diane Sawyer of ABC's Good Morning America, Carville writes,

“‘Republicans shouldn't be worried. They should be in agony. They should be throwing up. Republicans had better get a better policy on prescription drugs and quickly. They're gonna need a lot more Prozac.’”

Fast forward to December 14, 2009: With Obama’s approval ratings at 44 percent and headed south, healthcare reform blowing up in the faces of leftist moon bats who believe in single-payer socialized medicine except for they sorry selves, and with climate change no longer a credible issue for the Democrats, Carville’s forecast seems a wee-wee bit off.

Obviously, the bloke must have meant 40 weeks rather than years!

Still, perhaps Carville’s title has future functionality?

Who knows, 40 years from now the American people may be willing to give the left another chance to destroy the greatest nation on earth?

However, unless the liberal mindset undergoes dramatic transformation in time for the 2048 campaign, there will most surely be another 40 week stinker in the picture for liberals.

Of course, no one knows for certain what the future holds. But there is no question about the fact that, despite the scholarly pontifications of James Carville, the Democrats cannot, and do not, rule the current generation!

By the by, how’s your supply of Prozac holding up, James?


(1) http://www.examiner.com/x-7666-New-Orleans-Literature-Examiner~y2009m5d23-James-Carville-predicts-40-more-years-of-Democratic-Party-dominance-in-book

14.12.09

Obama's One Great Accomplishment








By John W. Lillpop



Although Barack Obama has a complete failure in his first year in office, the fact is that the American people owe this Marxist illegal alien a debt of gratitude for at least one positive accomplishment.

Namely, because of Barack Obama, the most divisive and hated politician in America since Richard M. Nixon has been put in her bloody place before being able to invade the White House and do further damage to this great nation.

By sending the "inevitability" soldiers of Hillary Rodham Clinton into retreat, Obama has defeated the most vicious and pointed threat to America in decades.

For his success in sparing America the agony of another Clinton administration, Obama should receive another two-bit phony Nobel Peace Prize, an Oscar, and six or seven bedrooms and matching baths from Al Gore's grotesque mansion in Nashville, Tennessee.

Which is not to say that Obama is actually good for America, other than as the anti-Hillary pest exterminator that the nation needed so desperately.

Obama is as mindless with his leftist philosophy as is Hillary, but his help in demolishing the Clinton invincibility myth has been a treasure to behold.

With Hillary out of the way, those of us who are proud of America can now train our sights on the silly Obama and his socialist bubble machine, crazy wife, and closet Muslim background.

Sorry, Obama, you will have to go--but we do appreciate your anti-Hillary talents!


jwl

It's NOT About a Jolly Old Man in a Red Suit, Crowded Malls, and Max-ed Out Credit Cards











By John W. Lillpop



Progressives who continue to work for the total secularization of Christmas fail to accept the true meaning of the most cherished religious holiday in western culture.

Christmas is celebrated to herald the birth of Jesus Christ and the subsequent spread of the Gospel, which has gifted all of humanity with a new morality, the concept of individual freedom, and the belief that human equality is a gift from God.

America's Declaration of Independence confirms that truth with the words, " As we are endowed by our Creator with inalienable rights."

Dinesh D’Souza, author of, What’s So Great About Christianity, delivered a powerful speech titled, Created Equal How Christianity Shaped the West, September 16, 2008, at a Hillsdale College National Leadership Seminar in Colorado Springs.

In his speech, D’Souza states that, "Christianity is largely responsible for many of the principles and institutions that even secular people relish--chief among them equality and liberty."

For a scholarly reflection on the real meaning of Christmas, read the D'Souza speech at the link below.+

And Merry Christmas!

+Reference Link

http://www.hillsdale.edu/news/imprimis/archive/issue.asp?year=2008&month=11

Grading Obama: B for Baloney!














By John W. Lillpop


Proving that power and fame have not changed him, President Obama displayed his trademark arrogance and distorted vision of himself during an interview with talk show host Oprah Winfrey.

As reported, in part, at suntimes.com:

“Talk queen Oprah Winfrey chatted up President Obama and the first lady on a TV special Sunday night in which he said he’d give himself a B-plus (an A or A-minus if he gets to sign health care reform legislation).”

A B+, Mr. President?

In your haste to crown yourself as terrific, have you conveniently chosen to overlook certain realities such as:

10 percent unemployment?

Record federal deficits?

Worsening situation in Afghanistan?

Decline of dollar?

Loss of American prestige and power throughout the globe?

No solution to energy crisis?

Increased racial tensions?

And, most importantly, have you overlooked the way the American people see you as reflected in your ever plunging approval ratings, now at 44 percent?

When it comes to the Obama presidency, the American people hope for a B, as in brief!


http://www.suntimes.com/news/politics/obama/1937929,oprah-obama-christmas-121409.article

12.12.09

Tiger Taking ‘Indefinite Break’ from Golf?

Satire by John W. Lillpop

Tiger Woods is taking the extraordinary step of giving up golf in order to get his life’s affairs (pun intentional) in order.

As reported, in part, at wreg.com (1):

“Tiger Woods' decision to take "an indefinite break" to repair his marriage was greeted with surprise, bemusement and even relief Saturday as golfers, fans and commentators contemplated the immediate future of a sport without its biggest draw.

”These are tumultuous times for golf after Friday's announcement by its No. 1 player that he is taking time out following two weeks of allegations of extramarital affairs. Woods and his wife, Elin, have been married five years and have a 2-year-old daughter and a 10-month-old son.”

Giving up a career which has earned Tiger nearly one billion dollars seems a strange thing to do given the fact that his dalliances with as many as many as eleven sirens of the night and untold numbers of prostitutes seem to be the root cause of Tiger’s quagmire.

An analogy: Giving up golf instead of wild women would be like a falling-down drunk and confirmed alcoholic swearing off bar stools and beer nuts in order to sober up.

Or the addicted Cocaine addict who thinks that eschewing hard rock and sex will make him well in time for Christmas.

Time to man up and face your problems, Tiger. You need to have a man-to-man talk with your inner child and explain reality to the brat.

Namely, being married to a drop-dead beautiful blond sex pot is a pretty darn good deal and worth protecting—especially since not doing so could cost you a fortune.

Good grief, Tiger, it’s your off course strokes that may end up costing you $350 million dollars!


1
http://www.wreg.com/sports/sns-ap-glf-woods-reaction,0,254252.story

11.12.09

Mighty Marxists from Little ACORNs Grow!




















By John W. Lillpop


A savant of the Middle East offered this counsel to the people more than 2,000 years ago, "By his fruits shall ye know him!"

Those words have rich meaning in 2009, especially as pertains to the new age messiah, Barack Obama.

Obama is a favorite son to many foreign enemies of the United States as well as to all of the domestic leftists in the business of anti-American chaos.

A partial list of Obama well wishers should be enough to dissuade any patriot citizen from throwing in with Barack Obama, the communist non-citizen:

Fidel Castro

Hugo Chavez

Louis Farrakhan

Ari Larijani, Speaker of the Iranian Parliament

Ahmed Yousuf, Hamas political adviser

Most of Hollywood

San Francisco

The New York Times, Los Angeles, and Most Leftist publications

La Raza, the ACLU, ACORN, NAACP, and Nancy Pelosi

In addition, Obama is a huge favorite among the masses in Europe and China, where the best interests of America and her people are not a priority.

Citizen alert: Think very carefully before joining the likes of Fidel Castro and Louis Farrakhan in supporting a man whose presidency would be humorous if the stakes were not so high.

In other words, "Partake not of the forbidden fruit, lest ye be smitten with death!"

Thus, Saith Lord Lillpop!

10.12.09

Why No Apologies at Oslo?









By John W. Lillpop

Rarely has there been a more opportune moment for the President of the United States to use his bully teleprompter to apologize to the world for American misbehavior than was the case during the Nobel Peace prize ceremony at Oslo.

Indeed, President Obama could have used his talent for ringing oratory to take America, and her leaders, to task for, among other things:

*Blatant hypocrisy in accepting a peace prize on the heels of a major escalation of hostilities in Afghanistan.

Only an immature, ego-driven narcissist would accept the prize under the circumstances, rather than declining in deference to his Constitutional responsibilities to 300 million Americans.

*Embarrassing arrogance and lack of sophisticated perspective, especially given the fact that the Nobel Prize was awarded solely as a political means for ridiculing a previous American president.

Only an ego maniacal poser would actually believe that he deserved the prize after just a few days in office.

*Boorish, childish behavior in snubbing the long-standing ceremony and protocol of the Nobel Prize.

Only a rank amateur from the mob-infested streets of Chicago would display such disrespect and scorn for an institution that has just honored him.

All things considered, the doings at Oslo could have been a banner event for those who savor anti-American rallies and rants.

However, there was one insurmountable problem: There was no way for Barack Obama to blame George W. Bush!

This was all about President Obama acting stupidly. As a result, no apologies were considered necessary, and none were offered.

9.12.09

Tidings of Great Joy! ACLU Facing Red Ink Because of Green Flop!










John W. Lillpop

In keeping with the spirit of Christmas and the eternal Hope for reconciliation between mankind and our Creator, we are pleased to pass on the blessed news that the vipers and demons commonly known as the ACLU are the latest victims of Obamanomics and the ghastly depression hastened by that ungodly form of economic insanity.

As reported at forbes.com, in part (1):

“NEW YORK -- The American Civil Liberties Union has lost a quarter of its yearly donations after a major donor cut off $19 million in annual donations because of economic difficulties.

David Gelbaum, a wealthy California conservationist, said he was indefinitely stopping the donations that had made him the New York-based group's largest anonymous donor.

"For a number of years, your organization has received very substantial charitable contributions from me," Gelbaum said in a statement. "My investments in alternative, clean energy companies have placed me in a highly illiquid position as a result of the general credit crisis in the American and world financial systems."

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! What a bleeping pity, coming as it does at the busiest time of the year for ACLU anti-Christmas freaks.

Indeed, just when ACLU lawyers were geared up to invade court rooms all across the land to shut down nativity scenes, silence the singing of Christmas carols, and banish Christmas trees from public venues in order to shield Muslims, Jews, and atheists from wild-eyed Christians bent on violating the Constitution, their main benefactor goes belly up.

Adding wonder to joy is the fact that the loss of nineteen million dollars of ACLU blood money can be traced to the flop and fraud of green energy!

How SWEET it is!

Even though they are mercenary bastards, a simple message seems worthy for out-of-work ACLU lawyers: Merry Christmas, and God Bless!